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Facing old age and death: a study in contrasts
Two relatives of mine provide sharply different models for facing the ultimate test of our character
“We do not suddenly fall on death, but advance towards it by slight degrees; we die every day.” (Seneca, Letter 24.19)
Aging and death have been on my mind more than usual, of late. Not because I’m particularly old, yet. Nor because I’m facing imminent demise, that I know of. Rather, I’ve been interacting on and off with two relatives, let’s call them Eda and Oddo (not their real names!). They have given me much to reflect on because they are both older than I am (and about the same age, Eda being a little older) and one of them, Oddo, is now facing a terminal illness. The way they have been reacting to the onset of old age and, in the case of Oddo, imminent death, is a study in very sharp contrasts that has given me much to think about.
Before I go on, of course, a major caveat: this isn’t a systematic study of ageing and death. Those are available in the scientific literature (see, for instance, here, here, and here), and they have much to teach us. Eda and Oddo, by contrast, represent unique cases, as they differ in genetics, gender, nationality, upbringing, personal histories, and who knows how many other factors. So what I’m proposing in the…
